I don't have anything to hide

don't stray away from me
because I can be all that you need
I'll always be by your side
kick me, push me, pull me
throw me around 
and push me down
I'll stand right back up
and try to hold my ground

I'm weak at the knees
and I can barely breathe
the sight of you takes my breath away

baby, I can be everything you want
just give me one chance
and I will prove this is fate
can't you feel the butterflies you give me?
what about the fireworks when we kiss?

you're all I want
all I need
so baby please stay with me




.....

i can feel your blood rushing through my veins
your skin covering mine like a warm blanket
our hearts beat in sync
could this be love
or something we lust for
our hands fit together like a matching puzzle piece
the fire in our eyes show something
could this be love
or something we lust for

Yesssss, a day off. Got to sleep in without any interruptions, although I was supposed to get up early. Haha sorry Courtney. Now I'm gonna lay here and listen to music until I need to shower. -yawns- Maybe I can take a mini nap too lolll.

On a different note, I might get to go to San Francisco this weekend. That's exciting. Either that or up to Santa Barbara.. I'm trying to talk my mom into doing something, cause I believe I have fri-sun off.. Well I hope I do. But anyway, the only thing I really wanna do is go to san fran pride.. Sooooooo bad! It'd be weird to go with my mom though lol, but oh well! Okay I'm off! <3

The days seem shorter
and nights seem longer
I'm not sure where to go from here,
nothing seems too clear
life is just a blur
hours pass
days go by
nothing's changing
the days just run together
it's all the same shit
the nights drag on, never ending
can't sleep
can't think

the months go by
and still nothing has changed
nights too long
days too short
life still just one big blur

years have passed
I thought I'd be there by now
but here I sit in the same spot as before
no ambition, no desire
no will to strive and succeed

this is where I will be for years to come
days too short
nights too long
in this exact spot is where I will rot away
....decay

when your hand is in mine
and you're all I see
nothing else matters
and nothing ever will
as long as you're hand is still in mine
I know we'll be fine

forever baby.
I'll make promises I can keep,
whisper in your ear, "you're all I need"

I'll hold you tight
you know it's right
I'll kiss you softly
let my feelings rest upon your lips

Oh it is right
we both feel it in our hearts
each beat faster with each touch
it can't be wrong
I promised you forever and....

Forever baby,
it will be forever
with your hand in mine
it will last forever

why does time fly by
when I'm by your side

lets just stop time
live in this moment
the moment where you were all I saw

take my hand
never let go
we'll live in this moment
for the rest of eternity

I know I'm scared
I know I'm shy,
but I can't help it,
because you still give me butterflies

you make my heart beat fast
you make my heart beat slow
with just a simple touch
a simple kiss

when I see you smile,
it makes my day worth while
if I could freeze these moments
I'd live in them forever

so, when you start to fall
I will be there to catch you
I'll hold on to you
and whisper, "I'll never let you go"

just take my hand
and follow me
I'll take you to the spot
where we can stop time,
and live in this moment forever

spend the rest of our lives in pure bliss
hand in hand
we'll live in this moment forever

I have a story to tell
and no it's not a tragedy
more like a fairytale
see once upon a time
there was a girl
beautiful in every aspect
but untouchable is what I thought
so I watched from afar
your moves so graceful
your beauty overtook me

when you came close
I stood still
I kept my distance
but hoped that someday you'd look my way
and our eyes would meet,
and at that moment our hearts would beat in sync,
and we'd know....
but this never happened,
and no it's still not a tragedy
for one day we will meet,
and our hearts will beat in sync
and we will know.

Her eyes are the most beautiful ones I've seen,
breathtaking even,
she means a lot to me,
but it's something  no one can know.
My dirty little secret,
one I don't want to keep.
I wanna share the world with her,
I want her to be the one to take me away,
swipe me off my feet.
I don't wanna hide,
I want to love her..
But sadly, it'll never be....
So from here on
I'll just dream..
Dream of you and me..
Maybe one day we will be..
until then
I'll just keep falling.....
... I know one day you'll catch me.

<3

follow the road less traveled
dark nights leave raveled hearts intertwined
with desires when your eyes meet the love below
wait to bestow what they have been looking to find
or maybe it's lost
melodic thoughts
losing time,
running rhymes
let it take you
let it lose you
be true to the crimes during dark nights
let fate unfold you
let dreams create lies
seperate before you're too late

?

What do you do when your best friend betrays you?
Do you turn your head, and hope something like this doesn't happen again?

I'm not sure... It's hard to forgive him for lying to me, when he knows that everyone in my past has lied to me over and over again. I don't know, it just totally hurts. He's the one person that means the world to me, and he's hurt me. And another thing, he knows I'm at my most vulnerable right now. I practically broke down in front of him this past week... How can he do this to me? I just don't understand it....

I'm on the brink of a breakdown. All it's going to take is one more thing....

oh how I wish I could hold you in my arms
whisper sweet nothings in your ear
look into your blue eyes
gently grab your face,
and pull you in for an ever so soft kiss
let my emotions seep from my mouth into yours
let you feel what I feel
something that I swear is so real
there's something there
...a little light of hope
something I can only wish will turn into a burning fire of desire

It's not lust,
it's love
because all I want to do is hold you
look into your eyes,
let you see what I'm feeling
without even speaking a word

I think it's fate that we met
otherwise you'd already be out of my head
out of my mind, out of my sight,
but I do need you,
because I know that's what will feel right,
once you're in my arms
I know my world will be alright

Please forgive me if I seem forward
But I've never been in front of anything like you
Its the last place I ever thought I'd be
When I woke up this morning
Is it true?
And that you're always this breathtaking
And your smart and you're willing
My God this is killing me

Tell me all the things you never said
We can lie here and talk for hours in my bed

I don't have anything to hide
I don't have anything
Everything is not for certain
I don't have anything to hide
I don't have anything
Everything is not for certain

You started to see right through me
And I'm loving every minute of it
Its like I'm born again
Every time I breath in so,
If you're curious,
My favorite color's blue
And I like to sing in the shower
If you like, I'll sing to you

Tell me all the things you never said
We can lie here and talk for hours in my bed

I don't have anything to hide
I don't have anything
Everything is not for certain
I don't have anything to hide
I don't have anything
Every thing is not for certain

Tell me all of your hopes,
All of your dreams
I want you to take me there (take me there)
Tell me all of your hopes,
all of your dreams
I want to take you there (take you there)
Tell me everything
Every breath, I want you to know I'll be there
Theres just one more thing,
One request
I want you to take me with you

Take me with you
I will never let you down
I will love you now and forever

My parents want my life to revolve around school and work, nothing more. I need to strive and go above and beyond with my schooling, and I need to get a new job, because this one isn't challenging enough, and it doesn't pay all that well. I know I can succeed in school, life, and work, but the thing is, I think I don't accel in these things is because it's my own little way of rebelling against my parents. I've always been the good child. I've never done too bad in school, up until college. That's when I really stopped giving a shit about things. Yeah, I was depressed, and that didn't help too much. I have no motivation at home. I know I need to motivate myself, but sometimes it's hard. Sometimes it's just hard to get out of bed and drag myself to work... I want to be sooooo successful in life, I really do. I wanna be the best at everything I do.. I just want someone to push me, someone to be by my side, and help me get there.... I don't want to do it alone /;

Eh, I want to be able to play ice hockey. Dedicate some of my time to that, maybe get a scholarship with it, but no, mom says I'll never get anywhere with hockey.. Bullshit. If I got into a uni with a scholarship for ice, I have to keep my grades up in class, focus on my studies. It'd be so good for me, but she doesn't understand that... She never will. No one ever will.

Fahhhkkk. I wish life was easier..

Her eyes strike me like lightning,
and I jolt back.
I'm not sure what to do,
so I look away and give a crooked smile.
She notices, and I know she smiles back to herself.
Too nervous to move, to talk, to breathe...
But I want to get close, breathe her in. I need, feel and want everything she has to offer,
but it's only a dream, for we just admire one another from afar.

Her eyes strike me like thunder
and I jolt back.
I'm not sure what to do,
so I look away and give a crooked smile.
She notices, and I know she smiles back, crookedly too.
Too nervous to move, to talk, to breathe.
But I want to move close
to talk to her
to breathe her in.
I need to feel her,
not only in my presence,
but in my arms.
Too bad she'll be the one I only get to admire from afar.

For those of you who know me, it'd be three years and some odd months, if I were still with my ex.

We talked on the phone last night, it was nice, but in some sense a little awkward.

Got a text this morning saying I love you, and hearing your voice was amazing.

I'm totally not sure how to feel about that..